How to Deal with Rape
Biblical Ways to Deal with Rape Case.
Rape issue is a very sensitive issue, and many people who were victims do not want to hear people talk about, also they do not want to share the unpleasant story with others, because it brings back the horrible memories of the past. And if we don’t learn to deal with this issue in a Biblical way, it will cause more harm to the victims of rape.
That is why many of them chose to remain mute about the horrible ordeal that they went through.
Many people who have been through this situation right now are just victims, and now they are suffering.
They never choose to be raped, but they are already in it, and now they are getting what they don’t deserve.
Some of them are filled with lack of trust, bitterness, anger, wrath, and revengeful, and some turned to live a reckless life after the incident because they think are good for nothing anymore.
Once Saved Always Saved is Eternal Life
I read about cases of rape in many countries, it is just sad.
David Powlison asserted this, “every time you remember, every time you struggle, every time you feel that your heart is breaking under the weight of happened to you, ask Him to help you.”
By David Powlison.
What is Rape?
: to force (someone) to have sex with you by using violence or the threat of violence
: unlawful sexual activity and usually sexual intercourse carried out forcibly or under threat of injury against the will usually of a female or with a person who is beneath a certain age or incapable of valid consent.
When people are raped, it is just a life changing event in their lives.
Not only many of them lost their virginity through rape, but many of them do not remain the same person they used to be.
They go through many struggles that families, friends, and coworkers do not understand, and these unpleasant feelings of not trusting people, not loving people do not go away instantly, and many of these rape victims became bitter for the rest of their lives
Because when you look at the statistics, many of these victims are raped by someone closer to them or someone closer to them betrayed them to their rapists.
RAPE STATISTICS IN United States of AMERICA
80-90 percent of rape victims are female
90-95 percent of the perpetrators are male
75 percent of victims know their attackers
The incidence of rape is highest for girls under 18 years.
RAPE STATISTICS IN NIGERIA
70-80 percent of rape victims are female
80-95 percent of the perpetrators are male
90 percent of victims know their attackers
The incidence of rape is highest for girls under 15 years
RAPE STATISTICS IN SOUTH AFRICA
80-95 percent of rape victims are female
90-95 percent of the perpetrators are male
80 percent of victims know their attackers
The incidence of rape is highest for girls under 13 years.
In the Bible, the word “rape” is not mentioned, but instead, the Bible used the “Forced”.
So as defined above, according to the Bible, rape is forcing another person to have sexual intercourse against her will.
We will see in the Bible, the people who were victims. Let me say, in the Bible, according to the law of God, anyone that rapes deserved the death penalty.
Dinah was defiled by Shechem. And it was a foolish thing to do, and a very reasonable person will not want to force a weak one. And Shechem caused the death of every single male in that land just because he raped Dinah.
And Dinah the daughter of Leah, which she bare unto Jacob, went out to see the daughters of the land. And when Shechem the son of Hamor the Hivite, prince of the country, saw her, he took her, and lay with her, and defiled her. And his soul clave unto Dinah the daughter of Jacob, and he loved the damsel, and spake kindly unto the damsel. And Shechem spake unto his father Hamor, saying, Get me this damsel to wife. And Jacob heard that he had defiled Dinah his daughter: now his sons were with his cattle in the field: and Jacob held his peace until they were come. And Hamor the father of Shechem went out unto Jacob to commune with him. And the sons of Jacob came out of the field when they heard it: and the men were grieved, and they were very wroth, because he had wrought folly in Israel in lying with Jacob’s daughter; which thing ought not to be done. (Genesis 34:1-7 KJV)
Tamar was raped by Amnon his half brother.
Tamar said do not commit this evil act against your sister because it is a foolish thing to do.
And later Absalom the brother of Tamar asked his messengers to smite Amnon, and he died just because Amnon raped her younger sister.
And it came to pass after this, that Absalom the son of David had a fair sister, whose name was Tamar; and Amnon the son of David loved her.
And Amnon was so vexed, that he fell sick for his sister Tamar; for she was a virgin; and Amnon thought it hard for him to do anything to her.
And she took a pan, and poured them out before him; but he refused to eat.
And Amnon said, Have out all men from me. And they went out every man from him.
And Amnon said unto Tamar, Bring the meat into the chamber, that I may eat of thine hand.
And Tamar took the cakes which she had made, and brought them into the chamber to Amnon her brother. And when she had brought them unto him to eat, he took hold of her, and said unto her, Come lie with me, my sister. And she answered him, Nay, my brother, do not force me; for no such thing ought to be done in Israel: do not thou this folly. And I, whither shall I cause my shame to go? and as for thee, thou shalt be as one of the fools in Israel. Now therefore, I pray thee, speak unto the king; for he will not withhold me from thee. Howbeit he would not hearken unto her voice: but, being stronger than she, forced her, and lay with her. Then Amnon hated her exceedingly; so that the hatred wherewith he hated her was greater than the love wherewith he had loved her. And Amnon said unto her, Arise, be gone. (2 Samuel 13:1-2, 9-15 KJV)
And we have two cases where men want to rape another man. Genesis 19, and Judges 19.
Six Principles on how to Deal with Rape
1. Talk to a Spiritual Leader
I don’t want to say you should talk to someone you trust because some of these victims have already removed TRUST from their dictionary, and it is very difficult to trust again.
If you really want to deal with this issue, you need to communicate it to someone to help you through the horrible pain you are going through emotional pain. Trust me, you cannot deal with it alone, and you must realize that God put people in a position to help you.
I would suggest you talk to pastors that would help you, but before you talk to your pastor, you need to let your parents know.
And I want to encourage the parents to make themselves accessible for their children. Many parents do not understand what their children are going through, some of them are going through what you have never experience, be your children’s buddy, they really would to open to you, you care about them.
You don’t want to talk about it, you are silent about it, and it will corrupt you, and silent your life, and you will never imagine how miserable you would become without seeking for help, and counsel from spiritual leaders. Let me say this, God does not intend for you to go through it alone. If you are going through it alone, it will ruin you.
Tamar talked to his brother, and Absalom took justice in his hands, and ordered men to killed Amnon likewise Children of Jacob. Talk to the right people to help you, and not people that will make fun of you.
2. Ask God to help through the Recovery Process
Recovery and healing are gradual processes, while you are getting spiritual help from the sound Biblical teaching of the Word. You need to talk to The Lord.
I waited patiently for the Lord; and he inclined unto me, and heard my cry. He brought me up also out of an horrible pit, out of the miry clay, and set my feet upon a rock, and established my goings. And he hath put a new song in my mouth, even praise unto our God: many shall see it, and fear, and shall trust in the Lord. (Psalms 40:1-3 KJV)
God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble. (Psalms 46:1 KJV)
I have someone closed to me that went through this painful experience, sometimes the flash back of the act live in the memory everyday. There is nothing God cannot do, he will help through, he is a very present help in trouble.
3. Remember who you are in Christ.
I will praise thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvellous are thy works; and that my soul knoweth right well. (Psalms 139:14 KJV)
You must hold firm to your identity in Christ, you were just a victim, you are not worthless. You are created by God, and he loves despite the horrible situation you went through. Don’t let what you have been through bring you so low and cheap. Some turned to be prostitute after been raped. You are not prostitute, your body is still the temple of the Holy Ghost.
Know ye not that your bodies are the members of Christ? shall I then take the members of Christ, and make them the members of an harlot? God forbid. What? know ye not that he which is joined to an harlot is one body? for two, saith he, shall be one flesh.
Flee fornication. Every sin that a man doeth is without the body; but he that committeth fornication sinneth against his own body. What? know ye not that your body is the temple of the Holy Ghost which is in you, which ye have of God, and ye are not your own? For ye are bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body, and in your spirit, which are God’s. (1 Corinthians 6:15-16, 18-20 KJV)
4. Fill your memories with good thinking.
Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things. (Philippians 4:8 KJV)
I know this is very difficult step, but you must do it. It will help you greatly if you are always positive thinking about what has happened to you. Think about great future ahead, think about happy family, and think about great God who loves you.
Assurance of Salvation Scriptures and Verses Explain
5. Let Go
For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you: But if ye forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses. (Matthew 6:14-15 KJV)
You must allow forgiveness to prevail in this situation. Let me say this, you must understand what it means to forgive. If you are serious about healing from this horrible pain you went through, you must learn to forgive the perpetrator. If you want to be free from bitterness, hatred, and being revengeful, you need to forgive. Yes, you say, you don’t understand what I am going through, I know it is not easy for you to forgive, but forgiveness is a step you take after the other. I don’t expect you to forgive immediately, you need time, but you must forgive you if you want to be free totally. Absalom failed to forgive that led to revenge, and Children of Jacob failed to forgive that led them to killed lots of people.
Forgiveness does not mean that the rapist should go free, and not punished by the law
Forgiveness does not mean that what happened to you is normal, and not big deal. It is big deal to the Lord, and it is really a big deal.
Forgiveness does not mean that you will forget what happened to you
Forgiveness does mean that you are not going to take law into your hands and seek personal revenge of what has happened to you.
Dearly beloved, avenge not yourselves, but rather give place unto wrath: for it is written, Vengeance is mine; I will repay, saith the Lord. (Romans 12:19 KJV)
6. Be Patient as you go Through Recovery Process
It takes time to recover. Just as much as it takes times for someone who is wounded physical, it takes time for someone who is wounded emotional to recover. If you know someone who is a victim, and you are trying to help them, and they are responding instantly, you must be patient with them.
You must realize that Jesus is your best your friend, and you can trust him, and he will never disappoint you. He has been through pains too.
Seeing then that we have a great high priest, that is passed into the heavens, Jesus the Son of God, let us hold fast our profession. For we have not an high priest which cannot be touched with the feeling of our infirmities; but was in all points tempted like as we are, yet without sin. Let us therefore come boldly unto the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy, and find grace to help in time of need. (Hebrews 4:14-16 KJV)